When we think about treating ourselves more lovingly, resistance can arise. This is because the majority of our associations with love have been conditional. Conditional love says, “I’ll love you if… you act the way I want you to act, dress the way I want you to dress, etc., etc.” We received this message repeatedly in childhood, through religious training, mainstream media, and music.
Solution… bypass all the conditional programming!
This is the easy part. Recall a memory where you felt appreciation. I’ve found it easiest to access appreciation through my memories of being in nature… a beautiful sunset, hearing a hawk in the distance, or watching animals play. Spend 3 to 5 minutes (or longer) hanging out in that memory. Focus your attention upon the good feelings and anything that amplifies those good feelings.
When I spend time with these memories, energetically I’m amplifying those good feeling-experiences in my personal energy field. And what’s cool is that science is now proving that spending time in good feelings actually affects our physical body in a positive way.
And, when I hang out in those good feelings, amplifying them in my personal energy field, I naturally attract more people, situations and opportunities, that external stuff brings even more good feelings into my experience.
Try this upon arising in the morning!
When I do this appreciation exercise (above) upon arising in the morning my day unfolds in a much more harmonious manner.
It took a little practice but as I continued to practice, those good feelings became easier to access and I experienced that goodness more and more deeply every day.
Have fun with this. Don’t make it a chore. Look for things that evoke appreciation and it’ll become easier and easier. Enjoy!
When we’re triggered, the first thing to remember is that this is actually a fantastic opportunity. This issue/pattern is arising because the life force that enlivens this pattern (which is a part of our Essential Beingness that got separated off) desires to be freed so that it can express more fully in our physical experience.
As we learn the Art of Embracing we quickly discover what it feels to be Centered, how it feels to be in that neutral, zero-point position. As we release more and more patterns we naturally live our lives from this Centered place more often. Then it becomes really obvious when we’re triggered.
Caught in the Swirl
The experience of being triggered is very much like being sucked up by a tornado, caught in its swirl. Everything is spinning so fast and so crazily that we’re unable to think or see clearly. When we’re caught up in this swirl it’s very difficult to make a different choice. There’s often an overwhelming feeling-experience of panic or fear. We feel it happening. Often we know we’re caught. We know we’ve been triggered. However, when we’re caught up in this whirlwind, it can be very difficult to shift out of this crazy state.
How to get back to Center
When we’re adept at the Art of Embracing we’re able to shift back into our Center at will.
And if we’ve been triggered it’s impossible to embrace that issue if we’re not in our Center. If you are finding it challenging to get back to your Center it’s easiest to shift your attention first to something that makes you feel better. The objective is to shift out of the overwhelm, panic, fear or tension and access the higher vibrational feelings of openness, ease and relaxation.
Below are a few suggestions as to how to get back to Center…
Stopthinking about the issue
Don’t talk about the issue to others or to yourself
Focus on thoughts and feelings that make you feel better
Breathe… slow and deep. And place your attention upon the feeling-experience of the body… how the air feels passing through the body’s nose and filling the lungs… and how it feels to exhale and let go.
Listen to music that you find uplifting
Get physical – get those “happy brain chemicals” pumping 😉
Exercise – hike, bike, run, work out, gardening, walking
Smile at yourself in the mirror, even though you know it’s a totally fake smile. You’ll break out laughing at how goofy that fake smile looks.
Go for a drive, walk, run and listen to music that moves you
Once we’re back in our Center then we can embrace that energy form, that trigger.
And the good news is that each embrace and subsequent release makes it even easier to get back to Center. As we get clearer it also becomes easier to discern the subtler qualities of an impending “spin” and embrace the issue “on the fly” before we get sucked into the “swirl”.
And, just in case you’re not familiar with the Art of Embracing process, it produces real, measurable results. It guides participants through the process of how to shift into Center as well as how to release patterns and triggers.
To find out more about the Art of Embracing click here.
Throughout my personal journey I have explored many different forms of healing. However, I was repeatedly disappointed to find that the deeper patterns always found to a way to reassert themselves. This drove me on, searching for understanding, for answers, searching for a way that actually worked.
It wasn’t until the Art of Embracing began to unfold through me that I began to understand that patterns are more than just computer-like programs. Each pattern actually contains a part of our Beingness that has been split off, become separated. It’s a fragmented part of our Essential nature that has been rejected by others, and then, by ourselves. In fact, every pattern contains a part of our Beingness that’s been locked away, banished. And just as we feel the pain and hurt of rejection, so does it.
I then understood why pushing against a bad feeling/pattern – trying to make it go away by ignoring it, avoiding it, or concentrating upon its opposite – doesn’t work for very long, especially with the really deep issues. Repeated rejection only serves to feed the pattern, giving it more power over us.
With this understanding I began to shift all the judgment, resistance and aversion I had held in relation to disruptive patterns. I began to approach disruptive patterns from a place of heart-felt compassion rather than trying to change or get rid of them. As I learned to perceive them as Living Beings, as patterned Presences, their defenses softened. As I stayed present with whatever was arising they would relax, expand and ultimately dissolve within this complete acceptance, this embrace. As they dissolved, this space would be filled with Expansiveness, Light or Beingness.
And the shift is permanent! The pattern doesn’t re-emerge. Needless to say I was absolutely thrilled, ecstatic! I’d finally found a way that really works!